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SunSparkleShine

How to Get Unbent After Getting Bent Out of Shape

by Marva | Sun Sparkle Shine

Bent out of shape.

It’s not a term I particularly like. But I have to admit, that’s exactly how I was feeling.

I mean, am I the only one who likes to know the plans before they’re put into motion?

I know you’re thinking I must be a complete control freak. I hope not.

But it’s pretty obvious I don’t like change.

Or maybe more specifically, I don’t like disruptions.

It’s almost laughable given the number of disruptions I’ve faced in the last few months.

The latest one came just yesterday, on Mother’s Day no less.

Do you get bent out of shape by unmet expectations and unexpected changes? Let these life lessons help you bounce back and get on the right track. #trustingGod #lifelessons

I’m sure you’ve had instances when things don’t go according to your plans or expectations. Maybe you don’t get bent out of shape like I do but what do you do instead? How do you respond when disruptions hit?

Here are a few lessons from my latest shape bending situation.

1. Resolve to pray

It sounds obvious, right? But trust me, when I’m truly bent out of shape, praying is the last thing I want to do. And funny enough, it’s the one thing I need.

I love the Lord, for he heard my voice;
    he heard my cry for mercy.
Because he turned his ear to me,
    I will call on him as long as I live. Psalm 116:1-2

When bent out of shape, praying is the last thing you want but first thing you need.
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Do you get bent out of shape by unmet expectations and unexpected changes? Let these life lessons help you bounce back and get on the right track. 

2. Look beneath the surface

As with most situations, what you see isn’t always what you get. There’s often much more beneath the surface than what’s showing up in that moment. For me, getting bent out of shape yesterday wasn’t really about the situation at hand. My dislike of disruptions comes down to one simple thing: a lack of trust.

The Lord is my strength and my shield;
    my heart trusts in him, and he helps me.
My heart leaps for joy,
    and with my song I praise him. Psalm 28:7

For the king trusts in the Lord; through the unfailing love of the Most High he will not be shaken. Psalm 21:7

No wonder, I get all bent out of shape when things don’t go the way I expect. Failing to trust God has a way of leaving us on shaky ground.

We falter and flail when we fail to trust God.
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3. Choose renewal

When we get bent out of shape we can choose to stay that way or choose to shift toward God. One will leave us feeling stuck, bitter and resentful. The other will bring peace and holy transformation. Guess which one I’m choosing?

Do you get bent out of shape by unmet expectations and unexpected changes? Let these life lessons help you bounce back and get on the right track. 

Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. Romans 12:2

Stay stuck and bitter or move toward transformation and peace. #renewyourmind
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How about you? 

Do you get bent out of shape by life’s unexpected changes or are you bending to become more like Christ?

Wishing you blessings,

Marva - signature (1)

Please spread the shine and share this with your friends using the share buttons below. 

And if you’re looking for more encouraging and inspiring content, check out these amazing sites where I link up my weekly posts.

This post was featured

Speaking of link parties, I’m so pleased that this post was featured not just once, but three times this past week. Richella Parham was hosting her 300th Imparting Grace link-up so I was delighted to be featured for this milestone link-up.

I was also pleasantly surprised to learn that this post tied for the second most viewed post at Debbie Kitterman’s #TuneInThursday.

And my dear friend, Lori Schumaker also featured it on her #MomentsofHope link-up.

Thank you, Richella, Debbie and Lori! Please stop by to visit them by clicking the buttons below.

Imparting Grace - featured post. 

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Photo credit: Depositphotos


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  • Daily Encouragement – 3 Ways to Spark Joy in Your DayDaily Encouragement – 3 Ways to Spark Joy in Your Day
  • How to Trust God (as if I’m the Expert)How to Trust God (as if I’m the Expert)
  • How to Bounce Back When You’re Feeling DisappointedHow to Bounce Back When You’re Feeling Disappointed

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Filed Under: Christian Living, Intentional Living Tagged With: change, life lessons, self improvement, trust

Comments

  1. Joanne Viola says

    May 31, 2018 at 8:59 am

    Marva, there is much wisdom in this post and in your suggestions. Life can bring disruptions on any day, throughout the day and throw us into a tailspin. May I trust Him in the midst of the disruptions, as I turn to Him quickly, so that He keeps me on solid ground. So grateful to have stopped here today. Blessings!

    • Marva | Sun Sparkle Shine says

      May 31, 2018 at 11:17 pm

      Joanne, I’m so glad you found this helpful. I’ve been in a lot of tailspins recently and like you, my prayer is to turn to God quickly, rather than stew in my mess. Let’s pray for each other, huh?
      Blessings!

  2. Aimee Imbeau says

    May 24, 2018 at 9:09 pm

    Uhhh…I got bent out of shape just over an hour ago…about my blog (I thought I totally ruined it). SO, your post is timely. Thanks for sharing your wisdom on Grace & Truth, Marva.

  3. Dawn Boyer says

    May 24, 2018 at 8:42 pm

    Marva!!

    I loved this post. It was so timely today. I just spent time talking with my kids about the triggers that push us to react and how to respond with grace. Sometimes I need to take my own advice. But this was a great reminder of how to put our heart back in the right perspective. I have chosen your post as one of the featured posts on this week’s #Gracemoments Link u=Up. Thanks for sharing this with the #GraceMoments Community.

  4. Debbie Kitterman says

    May 23, 2018 at 4:50 pm

    Marva – Great post, #2 is the one that caught my attention … “we falter when we fail to trust God.” Oh such truth there… I just want to let you know that you are being featured tomorrow at #TuneInThursday

  5. Crystal Twaddell says

    May 23, 2018 at 4:30 pm

    There is a saying, “Before you go to your friend about an issue, go to God about the issue first.” I’ve never been disappointed when I have done this. It often gives me a different perspective and a more humble heart.

  6. Monife says

    May 23, 2018 at 1:49 pm

    Advice well received, my friend. Considering my love for planning and organizing, disruptions are always a challenge. The call to trust God and follow His lead is true and timely.

  7. Brenda says

    May 20, 2018 at 12:08 pm

    Pray, look, choose. Perfectly uncomplicated advice, friend. Why do we humans like to make things harder than they need to be at times? Thanks for sharing these simple steps, Marva. xoxo

  8. JD Iana says

    May 18, 2018 at 2:01 pm

    I definitely got bent out of shape last week and it took me an embarrassing amount of time to get unbent.

    • Marva | Sun Sparkle Shine says

      May 21, 2018 at 11:48 am

      Oh, yes, JD. There are times I stew in my discontent for way too long. I’m glad God has a gentle way of calling me back to the way of grace.
      Thanks for visiting!

  9. Bethany says

    May 18, 2018 at 1:05 pm

    I get so bent out of shape about the unexpected too, Marva. Thanks for this wisdom on straightening up to align with the Lord!

    • Marva | Sun Sparkle Shine says

      May 21, 2018 at 11:47 am

      Glad I’m not the only one, Bethany. I’m sure you’re grateful for His grace too!
      Blessings!

  10. KellyRBaker says

    May 18, 2018 at 11:59 am

    Getting bent out of shape is a phrase my mom said to us all growing up. These practical tips are perfect. The third one reminds me of “being a doer of the Word and not a hearer only, deceiving yourself.” Great post, Marva!

  11. Lisa notes says

    May 17, 2018 at 12:17 pm

    I don’t like disruptions either. But yes, they are unavoidable and often come at the worst times. ha. All three of your suggestions are great. This one stands out to me the most today: “Choose renewal.” Thanks, Marva!

  12. Lauren Sparks says

    May 17, 2018 at 12:13 pm

    I could definitely use some help in this area (and some grace)! And since my last name is Sparks, I love the titles you have! Found you today on lori schumaker’s link up. laurensparks.net

  13. Jerralea says

    May 17, 2018 at 10:36 am

    It always comes back to this: Do I really trust God?

    I say I do, but worst case scenarios are often the first thing to come to mind when trouble happens!

    Love how you included Romans 12:2 in the process of getting unbent. I have to take my focus off on what could happen (and usually doesn’t happen) and remember who my God is and that He will only give me what is best (not necessarily what I want). I’ll wind up in a good place!

    • Marva | Sun Sparkle Shine says

      May 17, 2018 at 11:29 am

      So tru3, Jerralea. Best isn’t always comfortable, is it? But God knows it’s just what we need.
      Blessings to you!

  14. Sandra Black says

    May 17, 2018 at 9:55 am

    Yes basically we would all love it if it was as easy for us to get unbent as it is to get bent. Nice to take a little time to think about this.

    • Marva | Sun Sparkle Shine says

      May 17, 2018 at 11:27 am

      Yes, Sandra, I sure hope it was as easy. It must be like losing weight. Easy to put it on, but hard to take it off! Lol

  15. Emily | To Unearth says

    May 17, 2018 at 9:54 am

    I love this! I need to remember to pray as the first thing when I can feel myself getting bent out of shape. This was such a helpful reminder! Visiting from #TuneInThursday. 🙂

    • Marva | Sun Sparkle Shine says

      May 17, 2018 at 11:26 am

      Prayer makes such a big difference, Emily.
      By the way, I’m glad we connected today via the Linkup and Instagram. Isn’t God’s timing amazing?

  16. Gayl says

    May 16, 2018 at 11:58 pm

    Marva, that’s such a good lesson to learn, though sometimes hard to put into practice. Sometimes I still forget to go to God first and start getting upset. But how much better to put our trust in Him even if things don’t go the way we think they should. He always knows what is best. Blessings to you! Thanks for linking up with us at the #LMMLinkup!

    • Marva | Sun Sparkle Shine says

      May 17, 2018 at 11:25 am

      The truth is, Gayl, I only learned this lesson but doing it all the wrong way, aka, getting upset first! Sigh, life’s lessons aren’t always easy are they? But oh, so worth it!
      Happy to be a part of the #LiteraryMusingsMonday

  17. Carlie says

    May 16, 2018 at 5:11 pm

    Thank you, Marv! It is so encouraging when you share from your personal experience. These are great tips to get us unbent.

    • Marva | Sun Sparkle Shine says

      May 17, 2018 at 11:23 am

      Now, if only God could hold up with the lessons. Just kidding. (kinda) Lol
      Love you, my sister!

  18. Melanie M. Redd says

    May 16, 2018 at 1:45 pm

    Love this one, Marva! It’s so easy to get all bent out of shape!
    Asking God to fill my heart with so much grace that I’ll handle the twists and turns of life without getting so bent!
    What a great idea – stay unbent!!
    Good stuff!

    • Marva | Sun Sparkle Shine says

      May 17, 2018 at 11:22 am

      You’re so right, Melanie, God’s grace covers so much.
      Thanks for visiting today, dear friend.

  19. Boma says

    May 16, 2018 at 4:10 am

    OK, so that’s what it is!?! This dislike for disruptions (I always called them interruptions!)! I do need to be bent back into shape every now and then. Thanks for sharing, Marva. Blessings to you.

    • Marva | Sun Sparkle Shine says

      May 17, 2018 at 11:21 am

      I think I need it more often that I’m ready to admit, Boma. 🙂
      Blessings right back!

  20. Brittany says

    May 15, 2018 at 10:57 am

    Oh my goodness Marva! I always think to myself, I’m not going to talk to God right now because I literally have nothing nice to say to Him. Thankfully, He does not require that I have something nice to say. He does not always need all the intricacies of the Lord’s Prayer. We will get around to those. He just needs us to keep talking while He keeps working because communication allows Him to reveal His beautiful promises. Loved this 💕

    • Marva | Sun Sparkle Shine says

      May 17, 2018 at 11:18 am

      Hi Brittany, thanks for sharing how important it is for us to keep the communication lines with God open. I confess, there are days I just feel like shutting down. Thank God for His grace and patience! 🙂

  21. Michele Morin says

    May 15, 2018 at 9:39 am

    Ugh. As one control freak to another, I hear you.
    The unbending tip that I’m working on is this: Trying to hold things loosely, my ideas, my plans, and my expectations. My confessional theology is based on an omniscient God who is also good. Even so, I sometimes behave as if I am the one who is omniscient and as if He is not trustworthy!!

    • Marva | Sun Sparkle Shine says

      May 15, 2018 at 6:14 pm

      Oh gosh, Michele, I feel your pain. I like your idea about holding things loosely. It makes so much sense and I see how biblical it is too. If only we could actually pull it off. But no, thank God it’s God who does the work, we just need to walk in step with Him. We can do this with His help!

      Blessings to you, dear friend. I loved your post about Tragedy and Truth today, by the way.

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Marva Smith - SunSparkleShine
Hi, I’m Marva, an island-living, sun-loving, Christian wife and mom. I’ve transitioned careers, welcomed reinvention and I’m on the lookout for what God is doing next. I enjoy showing women how to sparkle and shine for God by living fully and abundantly right where they are (John 10:10).

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