I have a confession to make.
It might have to do something with the fact that we are still on summer break! Whoa…it feels like it’s.never.going.to.end.
I mean, I love spending time with my kids. That’s the reason I switched careers after all.
But months at a time with no clear structure to the day and a mom’s about to lose her mind.
There’s only so much sibling squabbles I can take.
The funny thing is, I thought I was fine.
Until one day, I just lost it.
A big sigh and a lot of apologies later, I knew that a monster had moved in. He just crept up on me. Like, where did all that anger come from?
Well, you know, one of the things I love about the world we live in is that no matter what we’re struggling with, there’s help at the tip of our fingertips. And good help too.
Enter my friend Ruthie Gray to the rescue.
Now I knew all along that Ruthie had written a book on this very topic. I even agreed to be on her book launch team. I thought that her book would be great for other moms and I promoted it as a helpful resource for moms preparing for the madness of back to school. I was happy to help spread the word. Ha!
But God had a plan all along (Jeremiah 29:11). Doesn’t He always?
God knew that this monster that’s been living in my house has no place there. And He’s using Ruthie’s book to help me kick him out.
Count to Nine was written with moms like me in mind. The ones who think we don’t have a problem. Yes, I said it. But as you’ve probably figured out, I really need this. And maybe you do too.
So before I spill too many beans, let me just share Ruthie with you. I’ve invited her to share, in her own words, what this book is about. What do we do to control anger we never even knew was there?
Interview with Ruthie Gray, author of ‘Count to Nine – 9 Liberating Steps for Mom Frustration and Anger’
Ruthie, I’m so excited about this book. Can you tell us what prompted you to write it?
Marva, thanks so much for inviting me over to your space to talk about the book!
I wrote Count to Nine out of a need to overcome anger in my own life. I struggled with anger as a young mom, and once my grandson entered the “Terrible Two’s”, I realized my anger and struggle to be in control had never really left! When discussing with other moms, I realized that I wasn’t the only one.
I searched Scripture with a clear goal of learning what God had to say about anger, began implementing these truths, and started a Mom Time Out accountability ministry. That began in January, and MTO now has a membership of over 200 strong! Obviously, there is a great need for moms to control anger-gone-wrong!
What was your favourite part about writing Count to Nine?
Good question! I loved practically applying Scripture to each step, putting pen to paper to clearly outline the nine liberating steps. Scripture is our direct line from God on how to handle everything, and it gives such hope once we embrace it!
Clearly, there’s no shortage of parenting advice out there, besides the fact that this is written to moms, how would you say this book is different?
I think I just touched on it in the previous question-the answer is three-fold:
- Scripture, and how to practically apply it, pray it, and use it in our daily, mundane mom lives is the key. In the moment and out of the moment. In screaming and in the middle of the laundry pile. God is our Source of strength, and moms don’t realize how intimately He knows their needs. This book shows God in our daily movements. It provides Scripture Pillars (action verses), Power-Packed Pillar Prayers, a plan of attack, and a heart action (reflection questions) for every chapter.
- Actionable steps to move forward. We can read a book, but if we don’t apply what we’ve read, it doesn’t really help. Count to Nine provides actionable plans for each liberating step, and moms will see results through implementation!
- A beautiful BONUS printable journal with Scripture cards from the Scripture Pillars used each week. This makes it even more actionable.
- This method has already been tested with my Mom Time Out Facebook group, where moms are seeing wins daily!
What do you say to the moms who think, “I don’t need this; I manage my frustration just fine?”
I think that’s what the Enemy wants. He wants to fool us into thinking it’s not a priority, it’ll pass, the next phase will bring better attitudes, whatever. If we ignore this, we fall right into his trap, and we’ve passed our anger patterns onto the next generation.
Tweet ThisThe term ‘liberating steps’ sounds so freeing. How can we actually believe it’s possible to be free of our anger?
I love that term, “liberating”, don’t you? We can believe this is possible because Christ said it many times, “With God, ALL things are possible”! God created us to glorify Him. And wrongful anger does not glorify Him, and in fact, it makes everyone miserable, including ourselves.
God’s promise that ‘all things are possible’ means He will enable us to do His will. And His will is to be filled with the Spirit, self-control, peace, joy, love, and all the fruits of the Spirit! Our faith is the key to this liberation. What it boils down to is, do we really believe, and are we willing to invest the time to tackle our anger with Scripture?
What about the mom who’s really made some mistakes in her parenting? What if she’s really blown it? Not just today but over a period of time. What encouragement do you have for her?
It’s not too late! God is in the business of making all things new! The Enemy wants us to stay defeated. But our God is the same God who parted the waters of the Red Sea, made old Sarah conceive at age ninety, and raised Jesus from the dead! If He can do all that, He can make a way for that mom. I fully believe in the cleansing, freeing power of the Word of God!
What message would you like moms to take away after reading this book?
The biggest takeaway is to get in the Word every day, even if you only have a small amount of time. I give lots of creative suggestions for how to do that, both in the book and on my blog. God’s Word and prayer, along with the power of the Holy Spirit living inside the believer, are the keys to victorious living! Jesus said, “Without me, you can do nothing” (John 15:5). That is truth. But the counterpart of that truth is, “With God, all things are possible” (Matthew 19:26)!
Praise the Lord!
Praise the Lord, indeed and thank you, Ruthie. There’s hope for me (and for you) after all.
What about you?
Ruthie has kindly offered to give an electronic (pdf) copy of the book along with the bonus journal to one lucky reader. If you feel you really don’t need this, then this is for you! 🙂 Let’s kick this angry monster, out the door! Let’s finally control anger we never even knew we had.
I’m ready! How about you?
For a chance to win your free copy of the book and bonus journal, simply follow the instructions below.
The giveaway has already ended and the winner is Julie V. Congrats, Julie!
Everyone else can still get a copy of Count to Nine here. It’s available for just $7, which will be money well-spent. And at this time, Ruthie is still offering a copy of the beautiful bonus journal as well.
Wishing you blessings,
If you know someone who’ll benefit from this, please spread the shine and share it with them using the share buttons below.
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Photo credits: featured image is courtesy of Feminine Stock; other images provided by Rear. Release. Regroup.
About Ruthie Gray
Ruthie Gray is founder of MTO (Mom Time Out), a Facebook Christian growth and support group for moms desiring to control the temper and parent gracefully. Ruthie is married and has four grown children, two grandchildren, and blogs at Rear. Release. Regroup, – capturing joy in the transitions of parenthood.
You can connect with Ruthie on:
- You can also request to join her Mom Time Out Facebook group here.
Oh, I remember a few moments like this–time’s I didn’t realize how quickly I could loose it. Those last few weeks of summer can be very crabby kid days. I wish I had read Ruthie’s book when my kids were young.
Oh yes, Ginger, I completely believe that Ruthie’s book is going to help many mamas.
I’m so glad to have friends like you and Ruthie who’ve walked this road before me. I mean, I can’t imagine seeing them off to college, but when that time comes you know I’ll be turning to you!
“The struggle to be in control.” Ouch. I need to be reminded that this is a big part of it. I usually don’t even realize that this is what is going on inside me. Surrendering all control to God is what I need to do daily.
What a great lesson, huh Ruth? God wants us to surrender to Him in this and all other areas of our lives. I’m convinced He’s the only One who can help us experience lasting change.
Thanks for visiting and I look forward to connecting with you more!
Thank you for sharing this! I’m a struggling mom, too, especially when it comes to anger. I get so easily frustrated! With time, prayer, and hard work, I am making improvements, but it’s not easy. This book sounds lovely!
It does feel like hard work, Julie but I have a feeling that it’s a lot easier when we rely on God to do the heavy lifting. Most times I’m trying to deal with my emotions on my own and it’s clear that this isn’t the most effective way. I’m hopeful that with God’s help we can both overcome this and make it our strength!
I am one of those eager parents who is ready for her kids to go back to school too! It’s amazing how easily anger can rise up especially when you’re dealing with kiddos who fight 60% of the day like mine. I remember reading somewhere “When our little people are overwhelmed by big emotions, it’s our job to share our calm, not join their chaos”
That’s something that’s hard to remember in the midst of the chaos and a screaming child BUT by God’s grace we take a breath and ask him for help, wisdom and calm to help guide our children.
Thanks for posting this article/interview!
Glad to know it’s not just my kids, Liz :-). I love that quote by the way. It reminds me how important it is to fill up on calm so that I can have enough to share with them. Too often I’m already at my wits end by the time the bickering starts. As you rightly said, it’s God’s grace that will help me.
Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing your sparkle with us!
Ugh mom anger… What a great book. Thank you for sharing it at the Happy Now link Up!
Ugh, exactly. No one wants to deal with it, right Jen? I’m so thankful for resources like Ruthie’s to get me out of the yucky places.
Thanks for being such a gracious host over at #HappyNow! 🙂
I think all of us struggle with anger at one time or another. I agree that spending time in the Word really helps. This sounds like a wonderful resource. I’m your neighbor at the #RaRaLinkup. Blessings!
Hi Gayl, how lovely to have you visit from #RaRaLinkup.
Yes, I’m excited about Ruthie’s book and think it will help lots of frustrated moms — even those of us who are not so quick to admit that we need help. 🙂 Thank God for grace!
Thank you so much for sharing about this book here. This is my biggest struggle (sin) in parenting.
Thanks for visiting, Anna and for being so real. I’m praying that this is the area where God’s grace will produce the biggest changes in your life! With God it is definitely possible — believe that!
Praying for you (and me) in this area. 🙂
Blessings!
Marva, thanks so much for hosting for Ruthie. Her book is so great and so needed!
I completely agree, Jennifer. Her book combined with God’s Word has the power to transform lives — and families!
Thanks for stopping by, my friend!
I could really benefit from this book! I’ve been feeling “on the edge” for the past few days, and it seems everything my kids do lately irritates me. It came out of nowhere too, like you were saying. So glad other moms struggle with this also!
Thank you, Marisa. It helps to know that I’m not alone. Some days (and some seasons) are worse than others, huh? Thankfully, we now have the tools to nip this in the bud.
I’m sure glad our paths crossed and I’m looking forward to connecting with you more. I definitely enjoyed your piece on Christian Parenting today. Thanks for stopping by!
It really helps to know that there are other Christian moms out there who struggle with the sin of anger. Satan would love to keep us isolated and afraid to reach out for prayer and encouragement. It sounds like Ruthie’s book is exactly what mom’s need to get the direction and support they need!
Thanks, Wendy! You’re right, the enemy wants to keep us defeated, but God has bigger plans in mind!
“It’s not too late! God is in the business of making all things new!”
Amen! This is such a great interview on a topic so many of us struggle with. And Ruthie’s book is fabulous! I won’t enter the giveaway, because I already have my copy. Every mom should have a copy.
Lynnae, I so appreciate your support in this book endeavor! I saw your review on Amazon – thanks so much! You are too good to me.
Ruthie’s book is a good one, Marva!
Thanks for sharing this review and giveaway today.
I think many parents will be helped~
Indeed, Melanie. I’m one of those parents who’s already benefiting from Ruthie’s wise words. Having the two of you to answer my growing list of questions, I think I’ll be OK. 🙂
Great interview, Ruthie and Marva! It never worked to fight anger on my own. Thanks for pointing us to the One who is really able to help us manage those triggers and bless our families!
Thank you, friend! God is our only avenue of escape, and I’m so glad He plans that route clearly for us!
Sometimes, no matter what, we all need a little help in recognizing, managing, and changing the reasons behind our anger. I know I’ve lately struggled more with my anger and the littles. Now that the sun is shining again and we’re getting outside, things have definitely gotten better. It’s amazing what happens when we’re stuck inside due to weather (or laziness/heat, let’s be honest) for too many days in a row. 🙂
Yes, I love your honesty, Kendall. And you know, recognising the triggers is such a positive step. It’s like that old saying that goes, ‘knowing is half the battle’. Once we can figure out what it is that’s getting to us, we can deal with it at the core.
I’m so glad you’re enjoying getting out with the kids in nice weather. I hope you soak it up as much as you can and have loads of fun!
I’ve been having the kids work through their clutter stashes these past few days and my fuse is far too short. Why did I have to give birth to two little packrats? Why oh why? This looks like a fantastic book, thanks for sharing and for the giveaway opportunity.
Hahaha, Sarah. It sounds like you might need this as much as I do! 🙂 I’m so glad that we have the tools through God’s word and resources like Ruthie’s to overcome those areas of our character that we struggle with.
Here’s to kicking that monster to the curb!
Sounds like an amazing book and one I could really use! Thanks, Ruthie!
Kelly, I think you’ll find such encouragement through the book. Thanks for your comment!
I think every mom could benefit from reading this book! I really like the “actionable steps”–I fell like I need it laid out for me that way.
I’m in the same boat too, Cheryl. Sometimes I need someone to hold my hand and Ruthie is really good at that. When she shares her past experiences I feel like I can get through this stage after all.
Thanks for stopping by today. I’m so glad I met you!