Ask five women what success means to them and you’ll probably get seven different answers. After all, we women reserve the right to change our minds, right? 🙂
I bet though, that they’ll have this one thing in common — the belief that women can have a successful life by being and doing anything they want. This is usually the common thread when we talk about having it all. We may individually choose different things but we generally believe that a woman should have the best of everything available to her. Usually on her terms.
Where it gets a little hairy is when we try to distinguish between having it all because of selfish ambition and having it all in terms of pursuing our God-given dreams.
I should probably say at this point that it is commendable to have a healthy dose of ambition. There’s something incredibly special about a woman whose heart’s desire is to be her best for God.
There’s a fine line however, between being our best for godly reasons and pushing the envelope all the way past overwhelm to meet our selfish desires. When we bulldoze our way past being our best for God and run after our own schemes we risk paying a hefty price for the chance to have it all.
I believe that there are two ways we can spot the difference between selfish ambition and godly desires.
Real Deal or Counterfeit?
Think of it in terms of purchasing a new handbag. Imagine saving up your hard-earned money to buy the finest leather bag, only to have the straps break after a couple weeks of use. You thought you’d bought a high-end, quality, brand-name bag but what you actually got was a counterfeit. A knock-off. Poor quality, not worth the money. What a waste!
It’s the same when it comes to our ambitions. The fine leather bag is our healthy, God-given ambition. Pursue this and enjoy the benefits of a life lived on purpose.
Tweet ThisOn the other hand, selfish ambition is the counterfeit, ready-to-fall-apart knock-off. Not worth the high sticker price. Disappointing. Unfulfilling.
Spotting the Fake
I might not be able to see into your future but I believe there are two things you can do right now to spot the difference between the real deal and the counterfeit. These two strategies will help you choose a better, more fulfilling path to success.
1. Seek God’s guidance.
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. – Jeremiah 29:11-13
God is eager to bless us with good things. The future He has in store for you is hopeful and bright. But he wants you to diligently seek Him with all your heart. When you do he says you will find him. I believe that this goes hand in hand with him revealing his purpose for your life as well.
We can seek God’s guidance through prayer and careful study of His Word. Start by asking God to reveal His will for you. And pray specifically about decisions, those forks in the road, where we really need to figure out the best path to take. Jeremiah 29 promises us that God will show up when we seek him diligently.
2. Seek wise counsel
Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed. – Proverbs 15:22
The way of fools seems right to them, but the wise listen to advice. – Proverbs 12:15
On our own, we might think we know what’s best for our lives. We probably think we have our future all figured out. But then again, so did the fool and look where that led him – to failure!
Instead, the Bible encourages us to seek guidance from others. Your women’s ministry leader or a godly woman who’s a season ahead of you might be willing to offer some wise counsel.
But don’t just stop at asking for advice. If you’ve already prayed and sought God’s guidance, you can also trust that He will give your advisors wisdom too. So go ahead, be wise as the Bible says and actually listen to the sound advice. Dare I say, follow the advice. Having that extra set of eyes (and ears) can really help us find discernment.
So the next time you’re wondering which path to take on your road to success, consider seeking God’s guidance and the wisdom of trusted advisers.
What about you?
How are you able to tell the real deal from the fake in your life?
Are you actively seeking God’s guidance and the advice of wise counselors?
Wishing you blessings,
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I’m so pleased that this post was selected as a featured post by Carrie at the Blogger Spotlight Link Party and at Worshipful Wednesday by Mandy. You ladies made my day! Thank you!
I also love linking up with these other amazing sites.
I just wanted to let you know that your post is being featured on our Bloggers Spotlight Link-Up party that starts tonight at 10pm EST! Congrats and hope you come back to party with us again!
Wow! Thanks so much, Carrie. I’ve been enjoying your link party and the variety of posts you always have. I’ll be sure to stop by and share the love. 😉
Wishing you blessings!
Seeking God’s guidance and getting wise counsel are important. I have found when God has pointed out a path, the advisors confirm God’s direction even when they don’t know the path he has laid out. That is God giving us direction from all angles.
Hi Rachel. I love it when all the ‘plans come together’. God has so many ways of confirming His will in our lives. Amazing!
You’ve touched a nerve here with me, as this is something I grapple with, too. My pastor once said, “Faith dreams holy dreams.” I love that, and I think it’s true. God’s dreams for us far surpass anything we could concoct on our own. But how do I know which dreams are mine, and which ones are from God? You’ve given me some good stuff to chew on here. Thanks so much for sharing with us at Grace & Truth!
Great and inspirational words, Marva. It’s such a fantastic reminder that while we may have ambitions of our own, it’s always a healthy habit to let it take its course, and relinquish control of some of it. Everything happens for a reason, and we need to trust in the notion that there is something bigger and better for us along the way. Thanks so much for sharing this with us on #SHINEbloghop. It’s always such a pleasure to read your words 🙂
Wisdom once again, Marva. So many times we run on ahead, thinking our ideas are surely from God – when they’re only our desires. God’s Word and wise counsel are surely what we need to make wise choices in this life we live.
Thanks for sharing again on Tuesday Talk this week, friend. I always enjoy your wisdom.
Marva, so much wisdom here. The truth is we cannot have it all, we cannot be everything to everyone, we cannot do a thousand things to the glory of God. It has taken me 51 years to really ‘get’ that. I have learned to seek God’s heart on those things I am to do and lay down those things I am not to do. There is so much peace when I do. Thank you for linking up such a marvelous piece at The Loft.
Hi Leah! I always love a visit from you. 🙂
You have blessed me with your wisdom as well. I cannot do a thousand things to the glory of God — and after all that’s what it’s all about. I’m still learning from amazing women like you how to lay down the things that are not mine and be satisfied. I appreciate your example more than you know!
Wishing you blessings and a joy-filled Sunday!
Great post! I have written a post on my blog about being content with what you have because it is so easy to get caught up in the world! Thanks for linking up with us and we hope to see you back at #BloggersSpotlight next week!
Thanks for stopping by, Carrie. I’ve really enjoyed finding #BloggersSpotlight and hope to visit weekly.
I will be sure to check out your post — it sounds like a good one! Blessings to you.
Finding our purpose and still feeling like we are achieving our dreams can be difficult at times. Especially when marriage and children come into our lives. You have offered great tools here to seek God first and trust Him to lead our paths. Thanks for offering this wonderful post at Party at My Place.
It’s a careful ‘balance’ that I’m still trying to figure out, Michelle. And I have a feeling that I might not quite fully grasp it this side of heaven; yet I’m willing to keep learning and sharing those lessons.
I’m so glad you enjoyed reading this and appreciate you stopping by. I like linking up to your party and soaking up all the wisdom I can. 🙂
Such great wisdom you’ve shared here! I know that I find peace in God’s will for my life, and I only find heartache when I selfishly pursue my human desires. Yet it’s so easy to get caught up in doing what we want. Your advice is great: Seek God and seek godly counsel. Thanks for this! Sharing now!
Thank you, Bree, it’s very sweet of you to share this. When I stay in tune with God the difference between God’s will and my human desires are like night and day. The trouble I get into is when I listen to my own little voice — oh boy!
I’ve enjoyed having you stop by and look forward to visiting you again soon too. Blessings!
Thanks for your wisdom here, Marva. I appreciate the advice to seek God’s wisdom. He knows our hearts and can sift our dreams and ambitions, so that what’s not of Him will fall by the wayside. I love the reassurance that He won’t let us miss the real deal if we’re putting him first!
Thanks for stopping by, Betsy. I always enjoy seeing your smiling face in my little corner of the web. It’s hard having dreams fall by the wayside but it helps me when I think that God sees the bigger picture and knows exactly what’s best for me. It’s usually only with the benefit of time that I can fully appreciate His wisdom but I’m working on getting better at that. 😉
Happy weekend, my friend!
I loved this post. Thank you, Marva! Blessings to you!
Thanks, Mari-Anna. I’m glad you enjoyed it. Hope you have a lovely weekend!
Wonderful post. You have offered much wisdom. We can so rush a decision. I love when #1 & #2 intersect – when godly counsel confirms the leading of God. I am glad to have stopped here today.Blessings!
Joanne, I completely agree — when those two things come together, there’s no escaping the message. And there’s something sweet about venturing out knowing that we have God’s blessings.
Thanks for stopping by! I hope you enjoy the weekend ahead.
I went from successful, highly decorated career to a stay at home mom, and never felt more judged by the world, yet at peace with God. Thank you for this encouraging post!
Liz, I hear you clearly. My new rhythm certainly has others wondering if I’ve lost my mind. But just as you’ve said there’s a peace that comes from following God’s leading. Of course everyone’s situation is different: for one it mean mean that God leads you home, for another to a different vocation, and yet another He might call you to be your best for Him right where you are. The key is to listen carefully, then be willing to go.
Wishing you blessings and a joy-filled weekend!
Good advice! So often, we neglect to seek and FOLLOW wise counsel …
Love the leather purse analogy. I’ve got several with broken straps so you’d think I’d learn …
Haha, Jerralea. You’d think I’d learn too…I suspect we’ll be learning and re-learning until we get it. In the meantime, we’ll keep passing on the lessons to others. Blessings to you!
Yes to all these.
A life may be grand but if God is not in the picture, I wouldn’t really call it successful. Wise words and practical advice. Love them.
I’m glad you enjoyed this post, Lux. It’s funny how we can think we have it all only to realise we’re missing out on the best when God isn’t in it. Thank you so much for visiting, I hope we meet again soon.
Marva, It is so incredibly easy to dive into the next “thing” without pausing to seek God on the matter! I have often been guilty of seeking Him, but not listening! Feeling that whispering from Him to turn one way or another, but ignoring it and going forth with my own wishes! I am praising Him that He walked me through those times. He stayed by my side when I ignored Him and today I’m USUALLY much better at seeking AND listening! 🙂 Thank you, friend, for this wonderful post! You are a blessing!
Lori, I can relate to rushing into the next thing. And they’re often good things too but I think that’s how the devil fools us. I’m so glad God protects us when we make unwise choices — even though there might be consequences we’re always assured of his love. Thanks for stopping by and leaving some sparkle on my page. 🙂
I love the point that selfish ambition has a high sticker price. So true. Not only for what we spend in pursuit, but also for what we miss. Great post today, Marva;)
Thank you so much, Ginger. I hadn’t thought about that but the high sticker price is as much about what we miss as what we spend. Great point!
I love this – so rooted and grounded in God. Thanks for sharing your wisdom, friend! <3
Always a pleasure to have you stop by, Stefani. Thanks for your kind words. I am so grateful for the godly friendship we’re developing. You rock, my friend!
Selfish ambition can be so prevelant these days and I’ve even seen it creep into ministry. It’s always wise to check our hearts before God to be sure that our motives honor Him rather than us. And accountability partners…yes! It’s always great to have safe and trusted friends that can rein us in when we get ahead of ourselves. Great to meet you through #tellhisstory today.
Hi Tiffany, I’m honoured to have you here. That’s a good point — we really do need to be reined in sometimes. At least I do and I’m thankful for those friends who care enough to tell me the truth in love. Blessings to you!
Awesome! Great wisdom here. My blog is about rising and stretching for God this week..as I’m facing a huge life transition..your words are fertilizer I’ll put in my new soil!! Love this: When we bulldoze our way past being our best for God and run after our own schemes we risk paying a hefty price for the chance to have it all. Such a good post! Visiting from #raralinkup today!
Wow, Kathy, I love your blog! It is such a breath of fresh air. I just signed up for your mailing list and you can be sure I’ll be visiting again. I pray that God will give you wisdom and light for your new path.
By the way, my friend Ruthie is going through a similar transition — perhaps you can check her out at http://www.rearreleaseregroup.com. The name says it all. 🙂
Thanks so much for visiting and leaving me some sparkle.
What a good word, Marva!
These are some very good words today!
I’ve shared your post today on Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter, and Stumble.
Hope you have a blessed day~
Melanie
Thank you, Melanie. I’m glad you enjoyed it and chose to share. I hope many others will be blessed by the message. Blessings to you, my friend!
so true – I like to say that false contentment comes from buying a purse that has holes in it! (which I try to check for in advance!) – Haggai 1:5 and 6 reads this way:
“You have planted much, but have harvested little, you eat, but never have enough. You drink, but never have your fill. You put on clothes, but are not warm. You earn wages but only to put them in a purse with holes in it.”
Thank you, Miss sparkle!
Thanks for reminding me of that scripture, Sue! That one fits right in! I definitely don’t want a purse with holes in it and I can’t think of anyone who does. It’s so clear when we put it like that, yet the world tries to get us to think otherwise. We’ve really gotta keep encouraging each other and constantly going back to the source of true wisdom.
It’s good ‘seeing’ you again. 🙂
Great advice, Marva! In reading Andrew Murray’s ‘The Master’s Indwelling’, I am reminded of how much we are robbed when we live the self-life rather than the Christ-life. God has such plans for us, yet we are often times so busy pursuing our own. Seeking God in every aspect of our lives while dying to self and allowing Him to live in us is the key – neither an easy or a popular route I might add. But with God, this too is possible.
I love that comparison: Christ-life vs self-life. My goal is to always choose the Christ-life and you’re right when you say it’s hardly popular. Then again there’s such freedom in going against the grain.
Thanks for visiting, Carlie!
By seeking God’s guidance I’ve pursued different things depending on the stage of life. It was sometimes hard to know what to let go of when I found myself juggling too much, but I believe that each time I’ve sought Him and tried by His grace to follow, He’s blessed the path. And I’ve had a few times when I pushed headlong into something with stubborn determination and well, yes that “handle snapped” to quote an excellent analogy. Great post, my friend!
Oh my, I think I’ve had a few of my own moments when the ‘handle snapped’. I haven’t heard that one before but the visual it creates really fits in here nicely.
I always appreciate learning from your example, Deb. Your godly wisdom inspires me more than you know!
You speak truth here and I am so thankful! We all need to hear this message – maybe daily, in fact! I know my heart is prone to selfish ambition, so I appreciate your reminders to seek God and to seek godly counsel. 🙂
I always appreciate seeing you here, Alison.
Trust me, this is a truth I need to hear daily too! 🙂 My heart can be all over the place but I find when I focus on seeking God first and turning to those who are equipped with his Word, life begins to make a lot more sense.